SPARK Insights by Coach Reg — Issue #0031

Last week, I told you about my 107.

One round.
Total unraveling.

A meltdown on the course that forced me to stare straight into a mirror I didn’t want to see.

This week? Same course, same player, same me — but a completely different outcome.

My best round ever: 83

And here’s the kicker: I did it with a tweaked back and a brace strapped around my waist.

I didn’t plan it. I didn’t force it. I didn’t expect it.

But I’m convinced it didn’t happen despite my limitations — it happened because of them.

A Quick Golf Lesson (For My Non-Golf Friends)

If golf lingo makes your eyes glaze over, here’s the gist:

A golf course has 18 holes, each with a “par” — the number of strokes it should take a skilled player to finish. Add them up and you get a course par, usually 72.

• Birdie: One under par on a hole (great)

• Par: Exactly what’s expected (good)

• Bogey: One over par (okay)

• Double bogey: Two over par (ouch)

For pros, shooting par or under is expected. For amateurs like me (I carry a 17 handicap), a good day is shooting in the 80s or 90s.

A 107 means you’re fighting yourself more than the course...meltdown
An 83 means you finally trusted yourself instead...breakthrough

Saturday: A Pro, a Vision, and a Tweak

Before my Sunday miracle, Saturday’s round came with an unexpected twist: Arlene and I were paired up with a professional basketball player.

For those who know me, you know coaching basketball is in my DNA. So here I was — coaching DNA and golf passion colliding in real time.

I wanted to pick his brain, but I didn’t want to fanboy him to death. So I played it cool. But in the spaces between shots, we talked. About mental focus. About post-sports identity. About how athletes wrestle with mindset long after the crowds stop cheering.

I shared my vision for TEAM — The Entrepreneur Athlete Mastermind. I told him about SPARK Tee Time™ — my book on golf as a mirror for life and the “coaching by moving” concept for when I take a client on the course.

He got it immediately. (It was one of those rare moments when you know: I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be.)

But as the round wound down, I tweaked my back and knew I’d feel it the next day. Sunday’s game would be more about surviving than scoring.

Sunday: Low Expectations, Looser Grip

Sunday morning, brace on tight, expectations low. I told myself: Just get through 18 holes.

So I slowed down — everything.
I swung easier. I walked slower. I set up each shot with care. I breathed deeper.

Here’s what happened:

Hole 1 - birdie - great start
Hole 2 - bogey - okay, not bad
Hole 3 - bogey - missed a difficult putt for par, acceptable
Hole 4 - birdie - yay!! (Arlene NEARLY got a hole in one too)
Hole 5 - bogey - okay, tough green, moving on
Hole 6 - birdie - Wow! I’ve never had 3 birdies in a round, what is happening? 
Hole 7 - birdie - I holed out from 65 yards, my longest shot I’ve made…EVER. This is a new feeling…my heart was beating outside my chest!!
Hole 8 - par - nice
Hole 9 - bogey - okay

Through 9 holes, I hadn’t made a single big mistake. My drives found fairways. My chips were tight. My putts dropped. Four birdies in 9 holes. I’ve never done that in my life.

I told Arlene, “No matter what happens on the back 9, I have just played my best 9 hole stretch ever”

It turned out to be 10 holes of magic before fatigue set in. I completed 9 holes with only 35 strokes, but that back 9 took me 48.

Final Score: 83 (+11) - My best round to par…ever

Same Course. Same Clubs. Same Player. New Outcome. Why?

Because my back forced me to swing softer.
Because I was protecting my body, not forcing my game.
Because I released the death grip.

Golf is cruelly honest: the tighter you squeeze the club, the worse you play. The more you try, the more you sabotage.

With less tension, my swing found its natural rhythm. My tee shots found fairways. I didn’t overthink mistakes. I didn’t press for perfection. I just played.

It was the clearest proof I’ve ever felt: trying softer works.

Last week, my death grip on expectations made everything worse. This week, being forced to relax made everything better.

Golf is Life, Life is Golf

In SPARK Tee Time™, I talk about the death grip. How it ruins your swing. How it ruins your peace.

This round reminded me all over again:

• The tighter you hold on, the worse you play.

• The softer your grip, the truer your swing.

• The more you trust, the less you force.

Same in business. Same in coaching. Same in family.

Why It Matters

Last week’s 107 broke me because of what it meant. I made the number say something about my worth: “Who am I if I can’t perform?”

This week’s 83 healed me because I didn’t chase it. The brace forced me to trust, to loosen my grip — literally and mentally.

When I trust my body, it delivers.
When I trust my swing, it flows.
When I relax my mind, the score takes care of itself.

What the Double Bogeys Taught Me Too

Did I spiral again? No.

By hole 11, fatigue crept in. My back complained. My swing stiffened. Double bogeys on 11, 13, 14, 15, and 18 piled up fast.

But I didn’t lose my composure like the week before.
I didn’t throw clubs.
I didn’t cuss out the fairway.

I just played. And smiled. And noticed: This is progress.

A bad round has nothing to do with who I am, and a record round doesn’t either. It’s just data and an experience to analyze.

SPARK Insight Prompt

Reflect today:

• Where are you gripping too tight — on the club, the project, the relationship?

• What might shift if you loosen your grip by 10%?

• How can you show up softer, more trusting, more relaxed — and watch the game improve on its own?

One More Thing…

If this story resonated — and you want more stories, insights, and tools for using golf (and life) as your greatest mirror — grab my book SPARK Tee Time™: 18 Lessons on Life, Leadership, and Golf from the Fairway.

👉 Download it free at SparkTeeTime.com

See you next Wednesday at 11:11.

Keep your grip light — on the club and on life.

– Coach Reg